Gotcha Day- Knox Fam 6

Well, I wish I could say it was all smiles and roses... but it was not. The good news is... we have our precious little ones and we are very thankful for that! Today was so very hard. It is quite chaotic when receiving your child (or children in our case) in a room with 20 to 25 other families doing the same thing. Timothy had to take a 4 to 5 hour drive this morning to meet us in Guangzhou, and Annabelle's ride was about an hour or so. When it was our turn to "receive our kids" there were no smiles from Timothy and Annabelle... just lots of tears and lots of crying.

I was supposed to hold both children so they could attach to me first, but that was impossible. Timothy, bless his heart, was terrified (understatement). At first he came up to me to meet me and I thought he was going to smile but then the person dropping him off did just that.... dropped him and moved onto the next child so he tried to run and screamed and kicked and hit and cried and kicked and hit and screamed some more. So, I held him first. Let me tell you. He is heavy! And he is a fighter! He is three and the oldest from that bunch. He truly knew something was up and he was not happy about it. I talked to him and sang songs and prayed over him with all my heart. Poor Alexandra, it was breaking her heart to see him and Annabelle so upset. She just cried and cried. Hunter, too, felt helpless, but we could not have gotten through this day without the two of them. They did whatever they could to help us.. whatever we asked. They were troopers and such great big siblings. Chris and I are so proud of them!!!!

Annabelle was also scared and crying but she was not as "lively" as Timothy. Chris held her first, but then we switched after a bit because Timothy had been fighting me for so long. My arms were  giving out. I just had to have a little break. After a little bit we switched back and I had Timothy again. Finally Annabelle settled but no smiles. All the other children had long since settled by then. Timothy did not calm down even a hair until after we left that building and were in the bus on the way to the supermarket to get some items they would need.

Then, praise the Lord!!!! While riding in the bus Timothy started playing with a dog we sent him in November that has mine and Chris' voice in it. He kept squeezing the paw and it talked to him. He finally looked at me in the eyes and realized it was my voice. Then I got some smiles and even some kisses.

Annabelle was fine by the time we were in the bus and prefers her daddy over me (even though I did get a few kisses). She has a little of her big sister in her in that she prefers her daddy :) and also in the "bossy" department too. But, if she turns out like her big sis that's ok with me because I think she is pretty awesome!

Timothy is like his big brother.... he's a builder. We had some fake duplo legos in the room (real legos cost at least 3 times as much here... yikes!) and he went to town building with them.... for a really long time.

We have a tough road ahead of us. Timothy was very close to a specific nanny in the orphanage and they took such good care of him there. He will  miss them as Annabelle will miss her foster mom and dad. We desire your prayers so much as we tackle these next few days. They must get to know us and learn that we love them and that we are their family forever. This will be a hard and tiring task but we know that God is faithful and He will give us what we need.

All FOUR kiddos are asleep and so is the hubby. We had a very exhausting day and must head out early tomorrow. So.... I'm off to bed.

Thanks for praying.
Blessings,
~B

Day 2 in Guangzhou

Today is our last day as a family of 4. Tomorrow we'll be a family of SIX!!!  Can't believe we finally get to meet our little ones. Our group meets in the lobby at 2PM (1AM Chattanooga time) and then we go to the civil affairs office where we will meet Annabelle Hope and Timothy Justice. Then, once everyone has meet their children and we've spoken with their caregivers, we will load up and go to WalMart to get formula, bottles, diapers, etc. Found out that both Annabelle Hope and Timothy Justice still take a bottle of formula and rice a few times a day. I was a little surprised, especially about Timothy, but am looking forward to feeding them and bonding with them this way. Feeding is one of the best ways to bond and this way I can hold and rock them, look into their eyes and talk to them while feeding. I pray they will know us as Mommy, Daddy, Brother and Sister very soon. TOMORROW!

Also, praying for their caregivers tonight as it is the last time they will put them to bed. Know it must be bittersweet for them.

This morning we tried to watch Calvary's live feed but it was glitch city so watching tonight. Very tired and feeling a little icky. Probably just so tired and not used to eating this way. Hard to find things to eat here (other than breakfast.... did I mention that breakfast is fantastic here at the hotel?!!) Have already eaten at McDonald's twice and once at Pizza Hut which is not really the same pizza as at home... probably why I feel icky. Going to see about finding some better food tomorrow.

Also, there is a very strong odor that just hits you as you walk down the street. Chris says when we get home he is going to write a thank you to the EPA. Very foggy or maybe it's smoggy. Looks like this all the time.

Makes us very thankful for where we live.

After a super duper breakfast on the 30th floor...

We headed out to do a little shopping for Annabelle and Timothy. We needed to find them a snack and drink to offer to them tomorrow when we meet. We walked all over looking at the many shops and wandering through the streets. There are buildings after buildings of apartments here.

Here are some more shots around town.

The front of our hotel.

I hope we are a light as we walk here, and may our adoption journey remind you of your adoption as a child of God.

Blessings,

Bethany

Day 1

Well, after about 28 hours of travel, we made it to our hotel late last night (Friday night in China- Friday morning in TN). Our hotel is super nice and our room is a lot bigger than I expected especially after reading all the reviews about hotels in China. Our room already has 2 cribs in it just waiting for Annabelle and Timothy.

Lobby



We had a free day today so we slept late then went downstairs for a great breakfast! Then out and about near our hotel. The coffee was not so good at the hotel so we went to Starbucks around the corner. Although, I think we might try one of the other coffee shops around here. There are quite a few.

Went to 7 eleven (yes, that's right...7 eleven) and got some bottled water and this....





We are going to try to watch Calvary's live feed for the Sat. night 6PM service.... It will be Sunday at 7 AM here in China. I pray it will come through. Also tomorrow we have a meeting with all the families here from our adoption agency (Lifeline) and our guides. There are about 9 families here this week receiving their children with us on Monday. I think about 8 more families will join us next week after receiving their children in different provinces. We haven't run into any of our group yet but have seen others who have their new children and are on their way out. Sunday (tomorrow) is our last day before Timothy and Annabelle join us. If you think of us, please pray for our transition and for Timothy and Annabelle to have peace. I know God has been preparing their hearts.

We are so blessed to be here adding to our family and so overwhelmed that this is God's plan for us. Thank you for your support and prayers.
Blessings,
~B

12 years ago...

Twelve years ago at this wee hour, I was in the hospital about to give birth. So grateful God let me be Hunter's mommy (and Alexandra's and now Timothy's and Annabelle's too).

Little did I know that the 9 pound baby who was 9 days late (just so he could be born on leap day)  would bring me so much joy!

I love you, Dude!

You are going to be an awesome big brother!

Happy Birthday!!!!!

Different than coming home from the hospital...

Joel 2:25

"And I will restore to you the years that the locust hath eaten..."

Bonding with our adopted children will be different than bonding with our biological children because our bio children come home with us from the hospital. They grew in my womb, have heard our voices and felt our touch from the beginning. Our adopted children missed all those things and have lived without us for, well, in our case, 2 and 3 years. They don't know us at all. And like another mom said, Timothy and Annabelle have faced challenges that God spared Alexandra and Hunter from going through. Timothy and Annabelle, for whatever reason, were abandoned by their birthmothers. That is traumatic. Since then, they have lived without a mommy and a daddy. Yes, they've had caretakers, but not the consistency of a mommy or a daddy. I'm sure their nannies have loved on them, but most likely there have been times when there were cries but no answers- Unlike Alexandra and Hunter -when they cried mommy or daddy was there over and over again creating a bond from the repitition of a need being met. They attached to us as their parents. That's not something you think about on the way home from the hopital--at least I sure didn't.

Through our adoption journey we've been through trainings, and we read much on attachment and bonding. I'm so thankful we did because I wouldn't know anything about attachment issues had we not gone through the trainings. We will have to retrain Annabelle and Timothy to learn to trust us, to learn what a mommy is, what a daddy is, what family is and what strangers are. We have to help them to understand that we won't abandon them. We are forever.

We are so excited for March 5th! It's the day we will receive Timothy and Annabelle into our arms. However, we do not have a fairytale image in our heads. They will not be running up to us and calling us Mommy and Daddy and saying thank you for coming to get us. They will be scared. They won't know us (yet). I'm sure there will be tears (and not just from me). How would you feel being dropped off with strangers who look different than you, speak differently-- a different world than you know??? We will have to earn their trust and love. We've been praying for them and know you have too. Thank you! We've been on this journey and waiting for them for quite some time but they haven't been walking this road with us. This will all be new to them. They will both need some time to adjust. But, we do know God is preparing them because He called us to them.

We have no idea how long it will take for  them to attach to us securely. When I say no idea.... I mean NO IDEA! We may be out of sight for awhile as we help them adjust to their new life as a part of the Knox family. If we are out and about or if you come for a visit, please do not hold them or pick them up for now. Please don't take this as us being rude. We are just trying to break up the confused foundation that has been set in them the last couple of years. You may see them strapped to me in some way in one of my snuggly carriers/wraps when we're out or even when we're home. This helps with bonding. It is ok to talk to them just no touching for now please. Also, please don't give them any food or drink. Food is a need. In order to help create that bond, Chris and I need to be the ones to feed them. We may even go back and feed them as babies for awhile just to give them what they most likely missed out on as babies. That may seem strange but we will do whatever we need to do. We know they have missed out on a lot. We know that it will be very difficut at times but that doesn't mean we made the wrong decision to adopt. We know God has called us and He has provided. We know God will restore them. We are privileged that He has asked us to be a part of the process.

On Our Way!

Travel arrangements have been made. Dogs will be taken care of as well as the house. A sweet friend is here helping me stock the freezer with meals before we leave. :) Many errands to run before we go. The packing has started! Oh what to take????

I'm nervous, excited and my heart aches because I know how confused and scared our little ones will be at first. They don't know (yet) how much this family loves them and that we are forever their family. They've never had forever... just been in waiting.

Isn't that what it was like before claiming Jesus as my own? Desiring forever love but not really knowing what it was I was longing for? He reached down and picked me up and claimed me for His own. It is only because of this, that I can fly to another country and claim two more for our family. He's given us the desire, the resources, the way, the privilege to do this. He will give this weak person the strength to be Mommy to Annabelle and Timothy just as He has given me the capability to be Mommy to Alexandra and Hunter. All by His grace. All for His glory.

I pray that as you have followed our journey God has shown Himself to you- that you would know Him more. I can do nothing in my own power. I have no control over time. Finances are not mine. It is all His, and He has a purpose for when and why things happen. I can rest in that truth more now that we've been walking the road of adoption. He is good all the time. I hope I always choose to see that!

If you are praying for us... we thank you greatly!
Our prayer requests:

1. Timothy and Annabelle will be at peace with their transition and know that they are truly loved.
2. Quick attachment to us.
3. Remaining finances
4. Safety

If you would still like to send in a tax deductible donation you can by clicking on Annabelle and Timothy's picture or the Both Hands logo to the right.

Thanks so much for your prayers and support!
Blessings,
Bethany

TA!!!!!!!

Just got word we received our Travel Approval!!!!!! Yay! Yay! Yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Will have more news later but now I must get tickets booked so we can see these cuties in person!!!!!
YIPPPPPEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!